My motto this week is "The spiritual is up to me. But the physical is not up to me at all." -sent to me by SeminaryGirl.

I'm wondering, maybe I'm meant to push myself more than I think I should. Cuz I personally think I'm doing way too much and could use a break, but G-d thinks otherwise. No break for you, dear -- you can keep going. And some of you might say, "Too bad, if you think you need some self-care, do it, no matter what's happening." But obviously that's not the right answer because if I just took my "alone time" when I thought I needed it, then the challah dough would over-poof, (if running all over the counter is not called that already) and my baby would have to hysterically cry himself to sleep (which I've been known to do, but that's only with a "system" in place) and all the rest of the kids would miss out on their good-night kisses - (which they NEED), so I've come to the conclusion that I think I'm weaker than I am. G-d is telling me to keep going, going, going and I'm way stronger than I think I am! What a boost of confidence!

Did I get weaker? Why was I able to keep all my children home until the age of 4, but I'm desperately counting down the days until I can send the almost 3 year old out of the house? What did I used to do about the housework? Maybe my kids were in bed earlier, so I was about to start being alone from 7pm instead of sometime closer to 9. Maybe the house is bigger, more to clean and my standards got higher?

Just using this blog tonight to de-stress. Does everybody take an entire day and night to make challah? I'm always hearing of people who make challah on Friday or make it every week... Seriously, after today I'm wondering why more women don't back out (like I used to!) I put up the dough around 12:30pm (meant to start at 9am) and just got the first loaves in at 8pm. Don't laugh. Is it normal to take a few years off of making challah?