just ramblings...

As I stood there holding my baby, watching the fork lift carry in our UPack cubes, I thought how different my life is now, than I would've imagined about a year ago. I'm holding my 7 month old, and I'm moving out of Seattle. If someone would've predicted this, I would've laughed them off!

I like to remind myself daily how happy we are to have Penina in our lives. I have to be careful not to say this out loud too much, because a very observant other child asks, does that make Penina more important than the rest of us? But Penina just brings joy to all of us. The other morning the kids were doing their daily morning arguing about who's allowed to be around whom getting dressed and where eachother's room is. They were all yelling and grumping and I started grumping too. Then Penina woke up and everyone who saw her just smiled and said "PENINA!" and all the grumps were forgotten. It made me realize how much joy she's brought to all of us. Definitely for me. She's brought the possibility of a large family and the knowledge that dreams can come true:)

Today Shaul and I spent the day moving all of our furniture and belongings into two small cubes. And that's it. That is us. All that's left are the people. I look around and think, "I am so lucky to be taking these people all the way across country with me!" Even though one of the hardest parts of moving are the children. Their emotional shakiness with such a big move makes it all ten times harder.

Moving is really scary for children. Everything they have ever known is changing. The world warns you about getting divorced, it's bad for children to have to live in two places.. but moving? Nobody says "don't move until the kids get older". Why is it any different? All of their familiarity is gone, nothing is the same. And the parents! They are so busy working on getting the move to happen, that there is almost no parenting love left to go around. That brings up the topic of how to parents mult-task when so much is needed from them in every situation? But that doesn't have to do with moving - that's a  question I ask myself DAILY.

How can one person be in charge of running a smooth, organized home, being a sweet, wonderful wife, and being "Mommy" to individual, young children? If we're missing one ounce of perfection, like we have a headache or am tired or distracted, then the whole tower comes crashing down. How can we expect anything BUT perfection - there's so much at stake! I'm all for the 3 wives... if I could have the job of focusing on the pregnancies, nursing and raising the children, that would be easier. Wife #2 could do the shopping and menu planning and #3 could do the carpooling, bathroom cleaning, night awakenings. The dad could do all the discipline. Team effort. What was I writing about today?